Burn, Baby, Burn!

The joy & pain of heartburn - not sure where the joy is, other than the baby moving higher so maybe there's some relief from pressure on the bladder. The pain I am familiar with - oh, my goodness! I guess I didn't pay attention to my reading material and possible issues to come and was really feeling miserable and trying to figure out what I was doing/eating to contribute to the problem. Then Jai sent me an article about week 29-30 and it clicked. Even though it's not pleasant, the information was strangely comforting ... for a bit!

I never really understood heartburn and indigestion, didn't have much compassion for regular sufferers. I've had it occasionally, but nothing major. Luckily I didn't have much issue in the first and second trimesters, but it is a regular, daily, frequent occurrence now. I've never drank so much chamomile tea in my life! Crystallized ginger "candy" helps sometimes, too. I definitely feel for people who suffer and don't always have an end in sight - at least I'm hopeful my discomfort will end when I have the baby. My mom said she remembers waking up after giving birth to my sister and I and thinking "I don't have heartburn." : )

Grandparents

Yesterday would have been my mother's 84th birthday. I didn't give it much thought until my Aunt left a message. Tara asked what it was all about and proceeded to ask if it meant anything and I said not really. 

I mean I miss my Mom and I really hate the fact that she is not around to share the milestones:
Eagle Scout - 1984
high school graduation - 1985
Spain - 1988
college graduation - 1989
moving out of the house - 1992
Tara - 2003
baby - 2008

Of course, this opens the whole can of worms about how my life might have been different if she were still around. Would I have gone to Sewanee, or Spain, or Baton Rouge? Would I have met Tara? Would my Dad still be alive? Would they still be married?

The timing of the baby is interesting b/c if the baby comes on time it will be 2 days after what would have been my Dad's 90th. It is possible that my child will be born on my father's birthday. That's cool but there again I miss my Dad for many of the same reasons. He died 12 years after my Mom so he saw many of the milestones I mentioned above, with varying degrees of enthusiasm. ;-)

For a lot of reasons I don't think about their deaths the same way as my Aunt does. She really, REALLY, misses her family (she is the last member of her parents' nuclear family left) and it weighs her down. My parents cross my mind a lot and I would say, most often in that "what if" mode. I see changes in the world and in my life and I would love to have their input.  The thought is usually gone as quickly as it arrived. I have my periods of depression, or as my Mom said, "feeling blue" but they aren't terribly overwhelming.

I do wish my child had the opportunity to know my parents. I knew my grandmothers but not my grandfathers and unfortunately my child(ren) will follow suit. I guess I have the opportunity to make them into mythological beings, which isn't such a bad opportunity. Besides we always have Bonnie and she will make up for everybody else who's not around.

Daddy Disconnect

Is it just me or does this in some way seem unreal?

Obviously Tara's body is changing. Obviously we are adapting the house and registering for gifts but as I told Tara last night none of this matches the pop culture image of life with a pregnant woman should be like and that is the only experience I have with a pregnant woman.

Tara still does a lot. Tara still eats the same as she always did, she falls off the wagon a bit more than usual but she still makes breakfast, lunch and dinner on most days. She's not needy or touchy-feely so there's been no, come rub my belly. 

I guess it will hit me the closer we get but right now - at 28 weeks - it doesn't seem so real to me.

Third Trimester - TIRED!

As with the transition from first to second trimester and feeling exponentially more energetic, the same seemed to happened immediately from the second to third trimester ... no energy! It is unbelievable how tired I am. Unfortunately I hear often how that's good training for living with a newborn and in general being a parent. UGH! In addition to the brain cell loss, the baby is using everything and leaving me with nothing. These days my goal is to go to work and hopefully accomplish something and get home. Occasionally I have plans after work, but that's going to have to change. Same with blog posts. I was so excited to create the blog and add to the blog ... then ... now I'm too tired! Jai will have to do more - just as he's picked up more slack around the house. Carrying laundry up & down stairs, cleaning the house, caring for the dog [he already was doing that for the most part! : )]. This baby-supporting business is exhausting work!

What does the expectant father do?

Since Tara's been pregnant, I've been reading lots of books about expectant fathering and you know what? I've noticed that it looks a lot like pre-expectant husbanding...

Tara: Jai, can you get this out of the car?
Jai: OK

Tara: I left a list of things for you to do while I'm gone.
Jai: Mmmhmmm.

Tara: Did you take a shower?
Jai: No
Tara: Why not?
Jai: Because.

Exercise during pregnancy

I love to exercise. I know that makes me somewhat of a freak. : ) However, I truly enjoy working out, getting sweaty, feeling the adrenaline and endorphins course through my body. I exercise for a variety of reasons - overall health, weight management, competitive spirit as well as solitary time. Also I love muscle tone (on me and others) - for example, Serena Williams ... amazing!

Usually I ride my stationary bike for 30-45 minutes every morning when I don't go to the Y for my aerobics classes. In April and May that wasn't happening - sleep triumphed. However, I still attended my Zumba class 2 mornings a week and went to water aerobics 2 afternoons a week. I like routine and even being pregnant I made some of it happen.

I already mentioned the beginning of the pregnancy and the spring tennis league. Playing tennis was my savior. In June the summer tennis league started. I decided to be ambitious since I'd been undefeated in the previous seasons and I went to tennis camp and thought it'd be good for my tennis "growth." So I signed up for the 3.5 league. However, I didn't consider a few factors in my decision-making process. I was going to be 14-20 weeks pregnant, 10 pounds heavier, it's HOTTER in June & July and the players are much better. Lastly I hate to lose and lose I did. My record was 2-4 with one default so technically I could say I was 3-4. I still had fun and played some great matches. Also I learned a lot about my game and some skills I desperately need to improve in order to be more competitive at the 3.5 level. My goal is 4-3 for spring '09!

Sadly I haven't played tennis in weeks and as my baby bump grew, I thought all that bouncing around would be uncomfortable plus I don't have a regular tennis partner (that's why I love the league). Recently I was talking with my sister who is coming to Nashville for a week's visit in early October and she asked if we were going to play tennis. We always play tennis when we get together whether in Phoenix or Nashville or one of our sister trip destinations. I answered "oh, yes" even though I haven't played in awhile and told her what our mom is always saying. "Ethel Kennedy (married to RFK I think) played tennis up until she delivered all of her babies" (I think she had 9-10 kids). I'm no Ethel Kennedy, but I hope I can move around and hit a few balls, maybe some games.

I stopped going to Zumba class in early August - too jarring - and I miss the fun dance moves. I still ride my stationary bike (only 20 minutes in the morning) and use my hand weights (a few reps). I still have water aerobics class, too. It's nice to be weightless in the water and also it is gentle on my joints. Thankfully I haven't had any swelling of the ankles so walking to and from the Y continues to be possible and good exercise, too.

Second Trimester - the last few weeks

In general the second trimester has been great. I haven't been as tired as I was during the beginning of the pregnancy, I eat anything and everything, I still can move and sleep comfortably. Even going to the bathroom often hasn't been too inconvenient - I drink water constantly so I was used to frequency. Finally the baby bump appeared, I started wearing maternity pants and tops, new bras were a necessity and people could more confidently determine I was pregnant and not just a little fuller around the middle. : ) During these weeks and months, I first felt flutters that have become more definite movements by him or her.

As I approach the end of 27 weeks and soon will begin the 3rd trimester, I feel HUGE! I know that size is relative and my perception is different from others ("you don't look 6 1/2 months pregnant!"). However, I truly wonder about the increasing size I will become. I'm definitely feeling more tired and I can see the need for those daily naps again. I'm a little slower getting out of bed and off the couch, I go to the bathroom a lot and the heartburn returned! Thankfully this baby is mellow, moves a bit, but no rib strains or elbow jabs like WWF (or WWE as it's now called) ... yet! : ) Thankfully the baby's heartbeat always sounds strong & loud when I visit the midwife. Mellow is good, like Jai's personality, and I hope that bodes well for post-birth also.

Nesting Weekend

Tara and I have been fretting about where and how to do a baby registry. We want people to reuse as much as possible (shop goodwill & consignments). However, we know that some won't or can't do that. We also want to use as many natural and/or organic products. Again, we recognize that might be difficult for some. We went to Target and created a registry. We exhausted what they had in the store and added online only items. In addition we list some other vendors, mostly online companies (see list above).

We also did some rearranging in the house. We are fortunate to live in a large enough house where we don't have to do a lot. The nursery is the room I had as a child and young adult. When we renovated 3 years ago we painted the room green, a neutral color good for either gender; it won't be repainted until the child wants to help. We needed to change it from living/office space to baby space and that's a lot of what we did this weekend. There's still some to do!