Father-to-be/Baby Shower #4

My lovely coworkers threw me a shower yesterday. My boss took the pictures, scroll through the photo stream below. It was a huge surprise in that I thought it would be only circulation staff (my department); it ended up being a whole library thing.

I'm a lucky guy.

Go here for photos.

The buzz has hit the fan

A week or so ago I sent out a mass email at work explaining that at some point in the near future I would be unexpectedly unavailable. At the same time my boss decided to throw a baby shower for me. Between the two events, people are constantly asking me "are you ready?," "how's your wife?" and "hello papa." It's sweet and nice to be liked, but the attention is a mixed bag. On one level I don't like the attention. I feel self-conscious and stupid even. On another level it is nice to know people like you.
Tara's comment: Welcome to my world for the past 6 months! : )

• "Am I ready?" I have no choice. I am nervous; I don't have any experience with babies.
  
• "How's my wife?" Tara is strong and confident. She looks as cute as ever. She's having some heartburn issues but other than that she's pushing through.
  
• "Hello papa." Yes, I'm gonna be a daddy. I'm nervous about the changes it will bring... no money, time or sleep, etc. I know I will be fine but holy crap!
  

One Month to Go and the Reality Sets In

I don't know what happened, but in the past couple of days the reality of what is about to happen set in.

I don't know what the trigger was, but the butterflies appeared.

Yesterday I sent out a mass email to my coworkers, the ones who I communicate with daily or weekly, to let them know that I will be out of the office sometime soon without much warning and for an indefinite amount of time.

Yipes!

Reality Check, 1-2-1-2

Until yesterday having a baby and being a stay-at-home dad was somewhere in the future. I knew the due date but it didn't mean a whole lot.

Yesterday I met with several upper level staff members (my boss, her boss, director of HR and director of Administration) about my future leave time and what not. I went in naïvely thinking there were possibilities of flex time or doing what I do part-time or something. During the meeting I was told in no uncertain terms that when my FMLA period has expired I will work at the will of the library. I imagine in more prosperous times flex, tele-commuting and whatnot might have been on the table but during this economic down turn there is no way the library can play with such ideas.

I'm not mad but I was served a true reality check. I might be able to work in the library but it will be part-time probably as a circ asst and who knows what my pay will be. As difficult as this job is I don't know how to feel about not doing it anymore. This presents tremendous opportunity - I will have little excuse for starting school or writing that book or who knows what - but it's gonna be hard too. Our income will drop about 40%, we'll have a baby and I will be the oddity known as stay-at-home dad.

My life is really about to change.