Monday, August 17, 2009

Sooo? How's it going..?

Filled with pregnant pauses, I get this question every time I talk to somebody about my career change.

Well...(insert pregnant pause)

It is going pretty darn good for me and I think for Julia too. I knew and I'm pretty sure Tara knew that this type situation works better for me than Tara. Why? (insert pregnant pause) Because I don't work well with narrowly defined schedules, I need room to grow, at least that's the way I like to think of it. Now, don't get me wrong. I've been as frustrated and thrown off as the next person when Julia changes her own schedule but my disregard for scheduled events makes it much easier to roll with the punches.

The stay at home thing is also hazardous for me b/c I am such a procrastinator. I can leave a task unfinished AND I can find excuses to do other things instead. A free flowing schedule like feed Julia after she wakes, try to get Julia back to sleep until she wakes again and repeat gives me a crap load of latitude. I can make the best of it but more often than not I make the least of it.

So far I have spent far more time in the kitchen than I ever imagined I would. If I'm not eating I'm feeding, if I'm not preparing I'm cleaning. I have been able to space out the house cleaning so I don't feel nearly as rushed on the weekend - this is probably the best thing so far. I hate cleaning and even more I hate having a deadline for it. Some cleaning I do more often...the floors. Johnders sheds constantly. I find myself dry mopping or vacuuming some floor in this house pretty much every other day. Outside...well its been too hot. I haven't done any additional gardening, I'm not ahead on any lawn or shrubs.

We've gone to the park, mostly Shelby Bottoms, a few times. Again, its been so hot that I can't take Julia, Johnders nor myself out in the heat for too long. We've been to the library once, Davis-Kidd once, we've gone to the grocery store umpteen times. We haven't hung out at any coffee shops yet nor have we done any children social activities yet. I've watched some but not an insane amount of TV.

I am not bored. I am not lonely. I quite enjoy my conversationless hours and the noisy baby (sometimes). I spend more time with Johnders - never as much as he wants but more - and I always excited to see Tara come home.